We Chinese: Government Officials Ordered To Cut Wasteful Spending
In response to declining government revenues, the State Council issued new rules banning officials from buying expensive alcohol, cigarettes, and gourmet meals for work events, […]
xi jinping
Official Report: Xi Jinping’s Family “Rich As Shit”
OFFICIAL REPORT By GONG CHANDANGOfficial Report Correspondent In a wild new report, it turns out Chinese President Xi Jinping and his family are “totally fucking […]
Xi Jinping Stalked By Mysterious Figure In Red Suit
By MI RI Holiday Correspondent Chinese President Xi Jinping is reportedly seeing red—literally. According to an unusual police report filed this week, Xi claims a ‘fat […]
We Chinese: President Xi Declines President-elect Trump’s Invitation to Attend Inauguration
President Xi Jinping has declined President-elect Trump’s invitation to attend his inauguration as the 47th president of the United States. What do you think? “Nah, […]
Hong Kong’s War on Digits: No Number Left Unpainted in History-Erasing Effort
Competing factions within the Executive Council now race to “purify” public infrastructure of any dates Beijing might prefer forgotten, digging back through centuries to earn […]
Trump Administration Considers Charging Taiwan for “Protection”
By WING WONG WANGForeign Affairs Correspondent BEIJING (China Daily Show) — In a surprise proposal that has the Chinese mainland and Taiwan alike scratching their […]
We Chinese: ‘Stranger Things’ Outperforms ‘The Northwest Years’ in China
CCTV’s ‘The Northwest Years’ is failing to capture domestic audiences’ attention, as well as losing the online social media war to American TV show ‘Stranger […]
Xi Jinping Announces Confucius Institutes Aim Not for ‘Transnational Repression’—But ‘Transgalactic Repression’
By OH LI WON SHOUEducation Correspondent Beijing – In a jaw-dropping revelation, Chinese President Xi Jinping declared that the worldwide network of Confucius Institutes is […]
Diary: Xi Jinping’s ‘Big Party Congress’
October 12 Morning Well, it’s taken a while — again! Some of my rivals still don’t understand that I’m unique, a man of destiny with […]
We Chinese: What do you think of Speaker Pelosi’s Taiwan visit?
US House Speaker Nancy Pelosi this week visited Taiwan in defiance of Beijing’s thunderous threats and denunciations. What do you think? I’m just glad […]