Hong Kong Hires Bounty Hunters From ‘Star Wars’ To Hunt Down Rogue Democracy Activists
By QUANSHAN CHENG’EJustice Correspondent HONG KONG — Secretary for Security Chris Tang unveiled a bold new strategy to track down and repatriate up to 19 […]
chinese authorities
China Claims Complete Sovereignty Over Mars
“Red China, Red Mars,” says official By ZHI RIInterstellar Correspondent China has declared “complete and total sovereignty” over Mars, according to Zhang Kejian, head of […]
We Chinese: UK Government Appears To Approve of Chinese Super Embassy
After reviewing a Beijing-funded study claiming that up to 4,500 protestors could fit in the surrounding space of the proposed Chinese embassy in Tower Hamlets, […]
We Chinese: Scholar Asks How to Make Woman ‘Obediently, Submissively Have Children’
After a visit to Kazakhstan, Wang Xianju, a professor at Renmin University, expressed wonder at the willing ease with which Kazakh women seem to have […]
Eight alternative uses for your Chinese passport
To boost its dynamic Zero Covid policy, China is restricting all foreign travel, clipping green cards, and refusing to issue exit visas. So what can […]
Uyghur teen really doesn’t want to go to ‘summer camp’ this year
By GAI ZAO and HAN HUAReligious Correspondents URUMQI (China Daily Show) — A Uyghur teen’s open letter to her missing family, citing a dislike of […]
China successfully halts spread of truth
By YANGXING RENSHIPandemic Correspondent WUHAN (China Daily Show) — Beijing has declared “complete victory” in its battle to bury the truth about the Covid-19 virus […]
‘Our mousetrap is open,’ Xi assures markets
By XIA DAEconomic Correspondent BOAO — China’s economy welcomes foreign investment, President Xi Jinping has assured overseas businesses, comparing it to a “vast mousetrap — […]
It’s Started, People! President Xi Jinping Stabbed a Waitress to Death at China’s Parliament and Everyone Just Nervously Applauded
All Chinese people love the “Two Sessions” period, in which unelected officials from all around the country convene in the capital to do whatever they’re […]
China to reopen next week as Qing-style authoritarian shopping mall
By WEINI PUDynasty Correspondent (BEIJING) — China’s State Council has announced plans to close the mainland for a short period, and re-open as a Qing-style […]