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MSS Overwhelmed By Influx of Intelligence After Successful 100% Recruitment of Chinese Diaspora as Foreign Spies
“No detail too small,” says Party directive as direct mailers clog intelligence pipeline By SO SU MIState Security Correspondent BEIJING — The Ministry of State […]
We Chinese: Government Officials Ordered To Cut Wasteful Spending
In response to declining government revenues, the State Council issued new rules banning officials from buying expensive alcohol, cigarettes, and gourmet meals for work events, […]
Official Report: Xi Jinping’s Family “Rich As Shit”
OFFICIAL REPORT By GONG CHANDANGOfficial Report Correspondent In a wild new report, it turns out Chinese President Xi Jinping and his family are “totally fucking […]
Chinese Military To Surprise Taiwan By Invading One Day Earlier Than Expected
By JUE WUEYIDefense Correspondent The People’s Liberation Army Navy tries to find a date that works for everyone As the world braces for a Chinese […]
Reddit User: “RFA’s Pink Dolphin Story Just Anti-China Propaganda”
By Ngo NguJournalism Correspondent Having just finished reading Radio Free Asia’s story on the endangered Indo-Pacific humpback dolphin, commonly known as the pink dolphin (Sousa […]
Xi Jinping Stalked By Mysterious Figure In Red Suit
By MI RI Holiday Correspondent Chinese President Xi Jinping is reportedly seeing red—literally. According to an unusual police report filed this week, Xi claims a ‘fat […]
Press Release: Ministry of Foreign Affairs of the People’s Republic of China
For Immediate Release China Slams China Daily Show: “A Marginal Outlet Craving Attention Through Baseless Provocations” Beijing, [10.12.2024] – The Ministry of Foreign Affairs of […]
CCP Orders Defense Contractors to Build Death Star
Defense Ministry Officials Said the Death Star With Chinese Characteristics Would Be Deployed for Domestic Surveillance Purposes By SO SU MIState Security Correspondent BEIJING (CHINA […]
Trump Administration Considers Charging Taiwan for “Protection”
By WING WONG WANGForeign Affairs Correspondent BEIJING (China Daily Show) — In a surprise proposal that has the Chinese mainland and Taiwan alike scratching their […]