We Chinese: Food Security Threatened By Invasive Pests
El Niño winds are sweeping invasive pests like the Brown Planthopper, Fall Armyworm, and Asian Rice Gall Midge from Southeast Asia into China’s rice fields, […]
We Chinese: CIA Releases Video Seeking To Recruit Chinese Spies
In an effort to recruit Chinese Communist Party insiders, the CIA has released two videos on social media showing fictional CCP officials becoming disillusioned and […]
Chinese Horoscope: May 2025
RAT Just because your best friend’s business was failing and you bought it at 40% of its value, doesn’t make you the bad guy, right? […]
We Chinese: Authorities Order North Korean Schools To Raise Rabbits To Feed Army
Because of a decades-long food shortage throughout the country, North Korean authorities have finally ordered all middle and high school students to participate in breeding […]
Chinese Spies Report Aimlessness, Depression, After Finding Advanced Spycraft Techniques Unnecessary In Trump Administration
By WAH NAHAmerican Correspondent Veteran spies worldwide have expressed dismay upon discovering their highly specialized training is no longer needed to extract secret information from […]
We Chinese: North Korean Officers Skimming Tobacco Rations From Soldiers
North Korean Army Officers have issued orders forbidding soldiers from collecting discarded cigarette butts so as to reclaim the unused tobacco for themselves, warning that […]
Glut of Cheap Plastic Junk Engulfs China After U.S. Applies Tariffs
By SHENG DANJIEConsumer Correspondent SHENZHEN — Just one week after the U.S. imposed sweeping tariffs on Chinese imports, provincial governors across China report being inundated […]
We Chinese: Officials Push Local Consumption Amid US-China Trade War
Government officials have begun implementing policies which they hope will boost domestic demand for locally made products intended for export to the U.S., as American […]
Official Report: Xi Jinping’s Family “Rich As Shit”
OFFICIAL REPORT By GONG CHANDANGOfficial Report Correspondent In a wild new report, it turns out Chinese President Xi Jinping and his family are “totally fucking […]
We Chinese: 65% of Chinese People To Be Obese by 2030, Report Says
Amid warnings that two-thirds of the Chinese population could be obese by 2030, the National Health Commission has begun a three-year program designed to address […]